Just call me pin cushion.

So the pharmacy called yesterday. They received the order for my medications from the nurse. The pharmacy girl started rattling off all the meds and what the co-pays were. I got the prices written down but I couldn't believe she kept going and going and going. I was under the impression there would be 4 or 5 meds. But no. I called back to have her go over the meds again. Here they are:

Dexamethasone- tablets
Doxycyclin- tablets
Estroderm- patches
Ganirelix- pre-filled syringes
Methylprednisolone- tablets
Menopur- vials (that I have to mix myself to inject)
Novarel- vial
Progesterone- vaginal suppositories (gross)
Progesterone In Oil- pre-filled syringe
Lupron- 2 wk kit
Baby aspirin


PLUS- I still have to take my daily medications. Synthroid, Metformin and Folgard.

Holy Shit.

They are delivering to my moms house sometime today because they need to be signed for and I didn't want them to be delivered to my job. The window is between 9am and 1pm. Considering it's almost 11am, I'm gonna say they'll be there closer to one.

SA and Water Sono.....Check!

Sunday was DH's Semen Analysis. Everything went smoothly and we'll get the results back in about a week. I'm sure everything is fine, though, because he was tested once before and it was normal, and everything looked good when we did the IUI.

We also signed and had witnessed all of our consent forms on Sunday. I was instructed to bring them all in with me on Monday when I go in for my BW and Sono.

Yesterday was the water sonogram. My appointment was at 3:45 and I got there about 10 minutes early. While I was waiting for the doctor, the receptionist brought me in the back and set me up with the woman in charge of billing, and I wrote them a check for the full amount of this IVF cycle. That woman informed me that my medications will be ordered today (Tuesday!) so I should get them tonight or tomorrow.

Once all of that was done, I was brought into the exam room and told to empty my bladder and remove everything from the waste down. That was nothing unusual. The nurse also had me sign a consent form. Fine.

Then the doctor came in. He said that they are looking at two things.

#1- whether or not a catheter is easily inserted into my cervix (ouch.)
Basically- this is how they will be transferring the embryos, therefore- it needs to be relatively easy.

#2- whether or not I have any "lumps or bumps" on/in my uterus that may interfere with implantation.

So- first he inserted the speculum- which is NEVER fun. I had to concentrate so hard on not flexing my muscles down there (unintentionally) so as not to push it out. I hate those things.

Then he used iodine to clean off my cervix. This just felt a little scratchy- but not bad. Like a pap smear, kind of.

Once that was done, He inserted the catheter. It went in nicely, so that was good. This is where it started getting uncomfortable. He poured saline into the catheter to fill up my uterus so they could get a good picture and make sure there are no polyps or anything. It was cool to see my uterus blow up like a balloon, but it was a very weird sensation and not comfortable at all. He said my uterus looked perfect and then pulled out the catheter. Once it was out it felt like someone was clawing out my insides. I was waddling a little bit and was very sore. I am so glad it is over with.

I am on day #8 of birth control pills. I go until Friday and then Saturday and Sunday I take nothing. On Monday I go in for my baseline BW and Sono, and then as long as everything looks good, I should be starting stims!!

That's all for now- i'll update in a couple of days.

Orientation.....Check!

So- last night was our IVF orientation. I will try to remember some details about it.

First of all, it was really, REALLY long. You have to be there before 6 because supposedly they lock the doors at 6. I arrived at about 20 minutes to 6. DH met me there because he gets out of work at 4 and wanted to go home to shower. Of course I was panicking when he wasn't there by 5:45, but he got there 10 minutes later and all was right with the world.

We went inside and sat in the waiting room with about 5 other couples waiting for everyone to arrive. I was entertained by an article about 'Twilight' that I found on the magazine table. The wait was only about 5 minutes, which actually disappointed me because I didn't get to finish reading my article!

We were ushered into a back room with a large conference table and a white board, and each couple was given a folder about 3 inches thick with information.

The nurse introduced herself and I immediately noticed that every other word out of her mouth was, "um". It was really, really annoying. But I eventually got passed that and was able to take in some information.

She went through everything that has to be done before an IVF cycle can be done. Most of it I have done already.

Go through billing department
CD3 Bloodwork- Me
Genetic Screening Bloodwork- Me
Disease screening Bloodwork (HIV, Hepatitis, etc)- Me & DH
Semen Analysis-DH
Water Sonogram/Hysterosalpingogram/Hysteroscopy- Me (Not all 3 are done, but at least one must be done to check the condition of the uterus)

We have done the first 5 things, and the SA is scheduled for 11/23 and the waster sono is scheduled for 11/24.

Antibiotics also have to be taken to eliminate any bacteria that we may be passing back and forth (ew!). We each take one dose of 4 pills at once. That will be done on Sunday.


After going through all of that stuff, she explained what ICSI, PGD, and Assisted Hatching were, and who might need it.

She then explained which meds were SubQ, which were pill form and which were IM.

I will be taking 2 SubQ (in the skin) injected medications (Menopur and Ganirelix), one pill medication (Dexamethasone), and one IM medication (injected into the muscle). Luckily, the IM is just a one-time shot.



**I'm off to my excel class! More later or tomorrow**

My IVF protocol

Lucky for me, AF showed her faced yesterday at about 5:00pm. (yay!)

I went to the RE this morning to get BW done to start BCP, and BW for the genetic screening. I also got my IVF calendar.

Today I start BCP and take them for 11 days, brining me to the 28th of November.

**In the meantime, DH and I have our orientation tonight, DH's SA on Sunday (the day we both have to take antibiotics) and my water sono on Monday.**

After the 11 days of BCP I go 2 days doing nothing. December 1st I go in for BW and Sono, and if everything looks good, I start stimming on that day. My stim meds include menopur, dexamethasone pill and then ganerelix when told to start.

Projected trigger date: 12/10 with egg retrieval on 12/12, fertilization report 12/13, transfer on 12/15.Start what they called vag caps and what i'm assuming is progesterone suppositories on 12/16, and estraderm patches on 12/19.

Here we go!

updating...

I finished provera on Friday. Its been 2 1/2 days and no AF yet. Only 2 1/2 more days to go until I know if I am out for this cycle.

Tomorrow night is the IVF orientation. It's 2 hours long. BOOOORRRIIINNGG.

I had to reschedule DH's SA for this weekend because we forgot to get a cup and every pharmacy in the world was closed on Sunday. SO annoying.

Just another day.

Nothing really new to report. Today is day 3 of Provera. I am still hoping AF comes in time to fit me into this cycle. We are still having DH's SA done on Sunday as well as my genetic screening BW and signing all of the papers. I am not goint to pay the bill until we know for sure we will be doing this cycle.

un-fricken-believable.

I specifically asked the NP last week if I should go to the office Friday or Monday to get BW done to start provera. They just called me and they're calling in a script for me and I have to start it TODAY. The woman who called me said if I don't get AF by the 19th- i'm out for this cycle. I am so annoyed. Last time I did 5 days of 10mg provera- I got AF exactly 5 days later. If that happens again, that put me exactly on the 19th. If I had known this before- I would have gone in on Friday for the BW and started it then.I need to go on BCP for 10 days.I will be SO upset if I miss this.

Yummy.

And so it begins...

I received a ton of paperwork in the mail from the RE, including prescriptions for DH and I to have blood screening done at an outside lab, a genetic screening blood test for me to have done in the office, and notes for me to set up a semen analysis for DH and a water sono for me after AF arrives. I am trying to get everything done as soon as possible so I don't have to worry about anything.

So- Saturday DH and I went over to the lab for the screening. The place was so packed that people were literally spilling into the hallway. We sat there for an hour (which wasn't too bad-surprisingly) and were the last ones called in. DH hates needles and having blood drawn so I was hoping they wouldn't take too much from him. They took 6 vials. Not too bad. I had 12 taken from me. I couldn't believe how much blood they took from me! Once we sign the HIV consent forms, we will be done with that portion.

This morning I went to the office to have my blood drawn to start Provera. It will most likely be 10 mg for 5 days. AF usually shows about 2 days after the last pill. Once CD1 rolls around I make my appointment for CD3 BW/Sono, and start BCP if everything looks good.

That's also when I pay my bill. Yuck.

I scheduled DH's semen analysis for this Sunday. That's also when we will sign the HIV consent forms and the grant papers (because they need to witness our signatures).

I finally feel like I am understanding a little bit better.

I'm definitely excited, but am not feeling to enthusiastically that this will work. I don't know if that's just my mind not letting me get my hopes up too much, or if I just have a gut feeling about it.

We are going to see Josephine the psychic medium on December 9th, so maybe she'll tell me if it worked or not.

Yes- i'm serious.

P.S. The picture at the top is not me! =)

Yipee!

I have been approved for the grant!!!

Total price- $3,030.00

This includes $630.00 for assisted hatching. Which I would like to use. But, if the doctor doesn't think it's necessary, we will get that money back. We will also get a refund for any medication co-pays the pharmacy asks for.

The office is sending me the paperwork and I should have it by Saturday!

A few of my Favorite Things...

My wonderful husband Ryan...

My puppy "Moose"...

My kitten "Boots" (she's one of FOUR!)

Wow. Just....Wow.

I just decided 2 days ago to move forward with IVF and the ball is already rolling!


I called the woman who deals with the grants today to make sure she received my application, and to find out how long it would take to find out if i've been approved. She told me that she anticipates no problems at all, and she sent it to the billing department, but unless insurance covers it we will definitely be approved!

First, I had to schedule the IVF orientation, because if I didn't go to one, I would miss the next cycle and have to wait until January. My 2 choices were tonight or the 18th. These choices sucked. Tonight I have my excel class (for work) for 2 hours, starting about 30 minutes before the start of the orientation. The 18th is 2 days before the cycle starts, and if I waited until then, I would have no idea what to do/expect before then. I was torn.

Luckily- the NP/grant lady called me back, and said she spoke to the front desk and they are going to make an exception for me because they would hate to see me miss this next cycle. Yay! So from now until then- I deal with Gail (the NP/grant lady), and she will tell me step-by-step what to do. Then when the class rolls around, I will be more familiar with everything.

So- on Monday I go in for blood work to start Provera and we are being sent a prescription to get screening bloods done as soon as possible.

On CD 3, I go in for BW/Sono, schedule a water sono and a semen analysis for DH, and I start on birth control pills.

Starting November 20th- we will be on our way *hopefully* to making our dreams come true! (I know, cheesy- but SO true!)

IVF- here we come! ..........I think......

So- yesterday was my IVF consultation with our RE. I was going to give injectibles/IUI another shot- but it wasn't even an option for me. The doctor said it was too dangerous because of all of the residual cysts that formed (p.s. my cysts are all gone now, except for one! yay!). He explained that I am one of those patients that is like a steep hill. It takes a lot to get me to produce any follies, but once I do, they just go nuts. There is too much of a chance of me hyperstimming to try that protocol again.

My 2 options were as follows:

1. Try Letrozole this next cycle, which will give me similar side effects as Clomid- dizziness, major mood swings, hot flashes, night sweats. This drug gives me a 15% chance of getting pregnant.

* The pros- putting the costs of IVF off, as well as all of the overwhelming instructions, medications and so on and so forth.

* The cons- If it doesn't work- it is one more month wasted.


2. Suck it up...and start the necessary procedures for starting a cycle. This gives me a 50-60% chance of getting pregnant.


Can you guess which I chose? Yup...Choice #2.


The doc says it will be safer, more efficient and if I get approved for the grant- pretty cheap considering what it could be.

So, if I get approved, I will start up on the pill and this new journey will begin.


My mom asked me if this was good news or bad news. I said good news because my cysts are gone and I know what I have to move forward with. Bad news because I just cannot wrap my head around the idea that I GOT PREGNANT ONCE ON MY OWN and now, I need to go to such great lengths. I can't believe it has come to this.


Last night I went to the Olive Garden with DH and his mom, aunt, brother's and one of the girlfriends. There was this little blonde girl sitting in a stroller at the table across from us, whimpering because her mother wasn't giving her food fast enough. I glanced at DH and he was just staring with this look in his eyes that I can't even describe. It was only for a moment, but for that one moment, I felt more like a failure than ever because I know DH wants a baby as bad as I do, and it kills me that I am having so much trouble making that possible.


Anyway- that's all for now. It's just a waiting game to see if I am approved for this grant. If not- it's back to the drawing board.

Just a few halloween pictures.

Here I am dressed as barbie. The eye lashes were super long and annoying, but DH said they made the costume and I had to wear them. They were peeled off shortly after I saw how scary I look in this picture.

Here is my sister and I as siamese twins for our work party. I am on the right- and we are not that huge!

Here is me as Barbie, DH as GIJoe, and friends of ours as Ace Ventura and a nurse.

On a fertility note...

Today is my IVF consultation with the RE. I have a few questions to ask and will probably jot down notes since DH can't miss work to go and I won't remember everything...wish me luck!

I will update later or tomorrow with the happenings.